Online Dating: The Ultimate Guide

So you are thinking about online dating?  Will this be a successful endeavour for you?  Or, will you simply pick any online dating site that shows up and register?  Will you wait for that right person to come out and find you?

When it comes to online dating, it is up to you to make it happen.  There is no reason why anyone that is looking to find their soul mate or anyone just looking to meet a great guy or gal should not be able to do just that.  The problem is that many of us leave it to the other person to make the move and to make it all happen.

We are going to teach you how to be successful at online dating by providing you with insider tips and tricks to make yourself and your chances of success better.

How do you succeed?  It’s all about finding the happiness that you are after yet being safe while doing so.  If you want to be one of those people that says that they met their soul mate on the web, then take these tips and tricks to heart.  You will learn quickly that they are the way to success.

Are you ready?

Let’s dive right in… below is a summary of what you will find in this in-depth article.

Table of Contents

1: Map Out Online Dating Success
2: The Pros And Cons of Online Dating:  Making Them Work For You
3: Find The Right Site First
4: Let’s Get Started
5: Profile Picture, The True Story
6: What People Are Looking For
7: Don’t Wait, Take Action
8: Emails, Send Them Effectively
9: Turn On The Charm
10: How Will You Do?
11: Meeting Them
12: Tips To Remember For Online Dating
13: Online Dating Test Answers

1:  Mapping Out Online Dating Success From The Start 

Online Dating Mapping It All Out

Online dating is something that anyone can do, but not everyone will do it in a successful manner.  Let’s think of this as building a business.  If you want to be successful at your business, you have to work with it from the beginning, nourish it throughout its hard moments and then know how to make your mark.

In online dating, if you would like to be successful, you need to start off right, build your profile in the right manner and then secure the final and lasting rewards out there.  You may not realize it but there are some pretty good tips and tricks out there that can help you to be successful at online dating.

Before we can tell you how to take your online dating experience to success, we need to map out where we are going.

Your Goals

The first thing that you need to do is to make goals.  What should you include in those goals?  Ask yourself these questions.

  • What am I looking to achieve during my online dating experience?
  • What am I hoping will be the method that I do that?
  • Who am I looking for specifically?
  • What am I willing to do to make it happen?
  • Can I dedicate some time to making it come together?

When you ask yourself these questions, jot down your answers.  You will want to come back and refer to them later.  Why do we ask them?  Developing goals for online dating is essential.  In fact, it is your first tip.  Without detailed goals, you will not do all that it takes to be successful.

If you do not have goals, you probably will not spend enough time on your profile.  If you do not have goals, you probably will not take the time to seek out others.  And, if you do not have the right goals in place, you won’t take that all important first step of calling on someone that you are interested in.

After you have determined what your goals are, next determine what you will do to meet them.  Here are the first things you need to commit to in order to be successful with online dating.

  • Spend a good amount of time developing a profile.
  • Spend at least a few hours a week looking for people that you would like to meet.
  • Spend a few hours a week sending off emails to those that you are interested in.

When you do these things, you are going to be steadily working your way to finding that perfect person to fill all the important parts of your life.

Being You

If you are someone that thinks they have to change who they are to be successful at dating, you will always fail.

Instead, you need to be you.  We will show you how to enhance the way you portray yourself to others so that those that would be interested in a person that has your qualities and characteristics will be lured to you.  We are not changing you.  Don’t try to create a profile or even a persona that is not genuine to whom you are.

2: The Pros And Cons of Online Dating:  Making Them Work For You

You have a good idea of what the pros and the cons of online dating are right?


  • You get to meet others from around the world when it is convenient to you.
  • You get to find that right person for you without having to deal with the bar scene or with blind dates.
  • The pressure is lower as emails are easier than phone calls.
  • You can find people online that are just like you, that already possess the qualities that you are after.  No more dealing with situations where you meet people that are no where near someone you are interested in.
  • You get to handle online dating the way that you want to.
  • It’s safer.

There are more possibilities.  Those are just a few of the benefits that are out there when it comes to online dating.  Yet, there are some things that are not necessarily good things.


  • You are not seeing these individuals in person for the first time.
  • You may not be able to meet them locally for a while if they do not live near you.
  • You have to count on what they tell you or provide about them in their profile is actually true.
  • It’s scary to take that first step.
  • You have to pay for a membership to meet others.


Those are just a few of the different cons that you may be facing.  Of course, you should take into consideration the fact that your potential cons are not listed here.  Nevertheless, our next tip is what will help you to get the most out of online dating.

Analyzing The Good And The Bad

Each time that there is a negative comment in your mind about online dating, figure out the benefits it can offer.

For example, one of the problems that many have is paying for a membership.  While no one likes doing that, think about it this way.  If you pay for a membership, you don’t have to pay for all of those drinks or dinners with other people you didn’t want to meet.  It is more affordable, actually, to work with people that you have already determined are right for you.

Another thing people say about online dating is that they just don’t want to take that first step and contact the other person.  No problem.  Later on, we will dedicate a chapter to learning how to converse with others for the first time.  And, we will show you how you can actually make this something that is beneficial to you.

There are many benefits to online dating.  There are plenty of opportunities for you to find the right person out there.

If you want to find success in online dating, you need to commit to doing it.  We will show you how to do that, but remember that it is a package deal.  You can not benefit all that you should benefit from just one tip.  Putting it all together is what will make online dating a true success for you.

So, where does that leave us?

Your first step is to commit to online dating.  It is fine to give yourself a time limit, if in fact it is a long enough one, to find the answers to your questions and to give online dating a try.  Yet, if you do this, we want you to make a commitment to do it with all of your heart and truly dedicate time to the process.  Only when you do this will you find the best possible benefits.

3:  Finding The Right Site First

There are many online dating websites and each of them offer something unique and different than the next.  If you find yourself dealing with the wrong site, you may find yourself wasting your time.

Since time is important to most of us, we want to give you some tips to help you to find the right place to date on the web.  We have written numerous articles and reviewed a few online dating sites already, so no need to review these again.  Click here to read our article on the Online Dating Sites in South Africa.

First, think about who you are and who you would like to meet.  Now, determine what the best online dating site is for you.

Who Are You?

Many of the big online dating sites do offer benefits of being able to allow you to meet a wide range of people.  If you are looking for someone special, though, you may find yourself facing a bit more trouble with these sites.

Instead of selecting just any online dating site, if you do have special characteristics that you are interested in, make sure you venture to websites that cater to just that.

For example, there are some very popular websites set up for online dating that offer only specific race or religion.  If you are interested in only finding Jewish people to date or you really only want to find an Asian person, these sites can help bring you closer to your goal.

If you do have a specific preference, using these sites is fine.  Yet, keep something in mind.

The number of people that visit a dating website is also an important thing.  If the site only has a handful of people on it, your chances of finding someone that fits with you perfectly is going to be hard.

In other words, your goal should be to find a website that is both popular enough as well as specific enough for any specific characteristics that you are interested in doing.

What The Site Does For You

Now that you know what kind of online dating website you are interested in, it is time to begin looking for the most ideal choice.  Although this can be difficult at first because there are so many out there, you will want to look for some key features on the dating site that you decide to work with.

If you choose to work with an online dating website that does not offer these key ingredients for success, you are less likely to find yourself benefiting from it or you may just have a more difficult time at it.

So, what is it that the website should provide to you?  Here are some key aspects to take into consideration.

  • It should provide a good range of different types of people (unless, as described, you are looking for specific characteristics only.)
  • It should have an easy to use interface that is not too complex for your understanding. To judge this, make sure you take a look at what the website offers in their introduction.  Is it hard to find information or to navigate the site?
  • It should allow you to set up a pretty complex profile, something we will talk much more about in the next sections.
  • The website should be affordable for you.
  • You should be able to tour the website and get to know how the system works before you commit to it.

After you have selected your online dating site, you can begin putting it all together.  Although it may seem like it is something simple, it should be taken quite seriously.  If you just brush through it, what impression will your dating profile give to others?

Take some time to browse several websites out there.  Once again we have reviewed all of them and you can find that article here.  Make sure that you understand the lingo and the membership packages.  Yes, it does make sense to spend some time comparing features and costs as it is going to be essential for you to do this if you plan to find the best opportunity for you.

Cost is important, but do not be fooled into believing that the lowest costing online dating site will provide you just as good of service.  On the flip side, do not think that the most expensive online dating service will provide you with the best service either.  In most cases, the middle of the road is the place to be.

Get The Most For Your Money

First off, you need to commit some time to online dating if you wish to be successful at it and choosing the correct site really does pay off.

More so than that, you also need to use all of the tools and features that they are giving you.  The site does have quite a bit at stake in you working with them.  If you find success, you are almost guaranteed to provide them with more users through word of mouth.

Therefore, those features and those tools are meant to help you to get the most out of your experience.  If the membership plan you have selected does not include the features you wanting, don’t go signing up to them just yet.  Well, not before reading through this article.

4: Let’s Get Started

Let’s talk about one of the foundations of any online dating experience.  Without this being put together well, you will not attract the right people and therefore are not likely to get the results you are after.

Your profile is the key to finding the right guy or the right girl.  In short, there is no chance that you will find someone out there on those lists of thousands of people without having a great profile.

Online Dating Profiles

What’s A Profile?

Most of the online dating communities use a profile as the way to meet others online.  After you register with your online dating site, your first step will be to fill out this profile.

Take the time to really consider each word that you put down on that profile.  The only way for others to get to know you is through your profile, at least for now.  Therefore, you must provide them with the necessary information there.

What’s important to say?  What shouldn’t you say?  Keep reading to find out…

White Lies Don’t Hurt Anyone

As you will go through your profile, you may be tempted to fudge it just a little.  After all, small little white lies do not hurt anyone, right?  Although you may be tempted to do this, whatever you do, don’t do it.  This is a huge mistake on your profile.

Lies that you tell here will be the framework of why your online dating relationship does not work and fails miserably.  The fact is that if you lie in this regard, big or small, you will find yourself facing trust issues down the road with those that just do not believe you.

Keep yourself honest throughout your profile.  If you can not answer a question honestly, then do not fill it in.  It will help you in the end not to lie simply because those that lie will be found out and if you are starting to fall for someone and then they find out that you lied, it is over before the relationship even had a chance.

Key Tips For Writing Your Profile

To be successful, you will need to write a profile that is geared towards several key aspects.

  • You should always be positive and even up beat in your profile. If you are positive, you will attract many more people to you than if you were negative.  Do not use negative wording in any aspect of your profile.  Do not mention words like “hate” in your profile.  Instead, mention something that is better.  Instead of saying “I hate jazz” say “I like rock.”
  • Make sure your sense of humor comes through. If you are someone that is interested in finding a person that is boring, raise your hand.  Most people are looking for someone interesting and funny.  If you do have a sense of humor, make sure it comes through. Yet, only do this in a positive manner as you do not want to insult anyone either.
  • Take the time to read through posting requirements and rules before posting your profile. If you do not do this, you could face losing your profile.
  • Don’t be overly picky. If you write in your profile that you are only interested in successful women that work in high paying jobs you are less likely to get any results.  Why?  In this case it looks like you are hard to please and that perhaps you are out for someone that has money.  Nevertheless, be open-minded about the qualifications that you put out there.
  • Don’t be arrogant either. Some people will be so arrogant that others just can not stand to be around them.  Instead of doing that, make sure you are completely able to meet someone far below you and still be able to have lots of fun.

As we mentioned, you want your profile to be up beat and positive to those that will read it.  Here’s why it is so very important for you to do this as well as some of the other tricks we will teach you.

First Impressions Matter

When it comes to finding someone online to date, get to know, even to marry, you need to be sure that your first impression is a good one.  How can you be worried about first impressions online?

  • It is more important in online dating to give off a good first impression than anywhere else.
  • The other person does not see you in person.
  • You can’t explain something to them unless they ask which most will not.

You can’t charm them with a smile, not physically anyway.  What’s more is that they can easily go off and find someone else to contact and get to know within 30 seconds of dropping by your profile.

Your first impression is a critical aspect of the online dating process and you can make it even more beneficial by simply insuring that you come through smiling, on the web of course!

How can you do that?  There are many great tricks for doing so.

Details About You

When writing your profile, one of the key things you will need to provide about yourself are the details.  There are two types of people that mess this up here.  There are those that provide way too much information, overwhelming anyone that is reading it and even driving them away.

Then, there are those that do not provide nearly enough information and those individuals are the ones that never get contacted because the reader was, well… bored with the profile and moved on.

You do not want to be these people.  Instead, you want to be the person that provides just enough information to draw the person in and allows them to give something to wonder about you.  You want to provide them with a teaser… to lure them in.

In addition, your goal is to create a first impression that will allow them to smile when they finish reading your profile. They should walk away from the internet and remember your name or something in your online dating profile that sticks out.

Why do this?  Because it will draw them back to you and encourage them to call on you.

What you should provide is not as clearly defined.  You should not relate too much personal information to those that are seeking you out.  You definitely should never tell anyone where you live, where you work, or any personal and physically identifying things about you.  These things can help to identify you and can lead predators to your door.

Yet, other information you should provide.  To help you to determine the best things to write about yourself, here’s a trick to use.

Grab a piece of paper and pencil.  Turn off the television and the internet for just a minute, write down anything and everything that comes to mind about you that is positive.

Write down the things that you like, the things that you enjoy doing, sports, cooking, music, religion, friends, family, caring, charming, someone to rely on… the list can go on and on.  Write down positive things about you just in general, without any purpose.

Now, take a look at your list of characteristics.  Which ones do you feel that you can put up online for everyone to see without being negative, without being too arrogant and without sounding silly?

Selecting the right characteristics matters a great deal.  Now, let’s turn this task around and this time do the same thing but write down the characteristics that you are looking for in the person you are trying to find.  Which ones come up this time?

When you look at it from this point, you should see some common characteristics listed there.  Why does this matter?  You will learn in the next sections more about this but having the right words in your profile is absolutely necessary to getting the right people to your website.

There are some very common terms that you will want to put in your profile, assuming that they are things that you possess.  Try to include any of these if they do in fact fit you in some way.

  • Honest
  • Hard working
  • Fun
  • Sincere
  • Normal
  • Employed
  • Caring
  • Dependable
  • Good Listener
  • Commitment
  • Understanding
  • Interesting

A Tip To Remember:

When you include the traits that you listed about the person you looking for in your own profile, you are likely to find yourself with more opportunities to meet Mr. Right or Ms. Right.

When you do this, you allow for the doors to open just a bit wider for you.

Okay moving on… keep reading we getting in to the meaty bits.

5:  Profile Pictures, The True Story

Now that you have done quite a bit of the writing for your profile, your next step will be to add pictures to your profile.  Your profile needs to draw in the person reading it and make them want to hit the button to email you.

Pictures?  No way!

Before you run off and hide, adding pictures to your profile is a sure way to get more people to read and see that profile.  If you want them to actually come to your profile and email you, you are going to have to lure them in.  Pictures allow you to do this easily.

Not just any pictures will work for you.  There is a fine line of what will and what will not work and that’s what you will need to understand to actually benefit from pictures.

Online Dating Profile Pictures

There is a great article on Online Dating Profile Examples at  Make sure to check it out, moving on…

What Pictures Say

Pictures are another essential element to a successful online dating profile.  Pictures allow people to see who you really are… duh!  Believe it or not, people are not necessarily looking at your beauty and your waist size but rather they are looking at who you are in those pictures.

Important Tip:

Always make sure that the pictures you place in your profile are ones that show who you really are, not something that you are not.

To do this, you will first want to get together a whole group of pictures and decide what they can offer to your profile.  Here are some picture qualities to look for.

  • The picture should show you happy or at least in a good mood.
  • The best pictures for a profile should show you doing things that you enjoy.
  • Good pictures are those that show you with friends and family, having fun.
  • Pictures of you do not have to be full body but they should be natural, not really posed pictures unless they are enhancing to you.
  • Natural pictures allow others to see who you really are rather than what you look like posing.

There are plenty of things to think about when it comes to pictures for your profile but you should not get overwhelmed by it.

Do not focus on what you look like and if your hair is perfect.  Remember, natural pictures are the most ideal choices.

You should choose pictures that show you doing things that you enjoy too.  If you like to hike, why not include a couple of pictures of you and your friends hiking?  If you like work in an office, you can show a picture of you taken at work, as long as you are happy at work.

The pictures that you place in your profile can be added in many ways.  Always include those that are clear and are well done and not ones that are hard to see as this will just confuse those that are trying to look at them.  Make sure that the picture at the front is the very best one of you.

Picture Warnings

Pictures are another first impression element again.  With that said, you already should be taking a second look at your profile’s pictures.  They should show you being true to yourself, not posing doing something you hate to do.

  • The picture should not provide any negativity in them as these will not enhance your profile or draw others to you.
  • Keep sad circumstances out of the pictures that you put up.
  • Do include some pictures of you alone rather than just of you and friends. If you always include a friend, the person reading your profile may think you just do not have enough time for them.
  • Embarrassing pictures should not be included in your profile.
  • Keep the sexy poses out of your profile too. You do not want to give the wrong impression.  Believe it or not, this will push people away from you!

6: What People Are Looking For

At this point, you should have a pretty great profile.  That’s the foundation of your online dating adventure hands down.  Now, we need to take a minute to talk about what others are looking for in online dating partners across the board.

No matter who you are… you are looking for someone that is just like you.

In other words, people are looking for normal people.  There is no one out there that is looking to hook up with someone that is too complex, too busy, too overwhelming, or someone that is too above them.
Sure, every guy says they want that hot model with all of the best figures, but the bottom line is that they are really looking for someone that is more normal that happens to be pretty.

How can this be?  Doesn’t everyone think about looks first in this world?

In reality, people are looking more for those that are normal and just like them because they do not want to feel or end up being rejected.

Think about all the times that you have gone out to the bar or other areas and thought, “She’s pretty, I would never have a chance with her.”  Or other such comments.  For that reason, girls and guys out there should keep in mind that their profile and their pictures in the profile should be, beyond everything else normal.

  • Don’t try to make yourself look like a supermodel because you end up looking fake.
  • Don’t try to increase your importance by saying that you have a different job than you do.
  • Don’t say you have special characteristics when you really do not.

People are looking for other normal people.

Your important tip here is that if you wish to have someone email you or contact you, you should come across as a normal person that is happy and positive.  That’s going to reel them in.  But, not just in the way of your profile and your pictures, but throughout the online dating experience.

Here’s what we mean.  Once you actually get into the dating scene, you will find that there are going to be opportunities to chat with others.  In short, you will want to come across as being able to talk to anyone in the right manner.

Most commonly, people will respond to you through an email.  Or, even better, you will respond to them in an email.  You may find some will instant message you as well.  Any of these methods is fine and perfect as long as you keep your first impression high.

Relax, It’s Okay!

When it comes to talking to others about who you are and what you are like, follow the same techniques that we talked about in regards to being positive, normal and coming across as someone that is trustworthy and honest.

We will get into how to send off that first email, but for know just realize that you do have what it takes to be a person that will get to meet others.  You will be the person that they contact and that gets to meet others.

7:  Don’t Wait, Take Action

When it comes to finding someone in the online dating world, the big secret is this. Do not wait for them to come to you.

Let’s play the numbers game here…

If you register with an online dating website that has several thousand different users on it, what are your chances of standing out?  What are the chances that you will actually have people emailing to talk to you?

There are two things to think about here.

  1. What can you do to get others to find you in the most effective manner?
  1. How can you find others and contact them to get things started?

Before you worry about how you can do this, it is very important for you to remember your goals.  You decided to commit to online dating and in the next sections we have some tips that may be a bit drawn out but that will help you find just the right people for you to start to get to know and really match up with.

Step 1:  How They Will Find You

The first thing that you need to do is to determine how you can make other online dating users find you.  Remember, this is a two step process.  If you truly want to succeed, these rules are necessary to follow.

One of the big aspects of this process you have already completed.  That is that you have designed a profile that is perfect for those that are looking for you.

Your profile should:

  • Depict you in your normal life and be honest to who you are.
  • Provide an inside view as to who you actually are as well as what is important to you.
  • Should be positive and allow you to come out looking interesting and someone fun to be with.

The next element is to insure that the words that you use within the profile are going to help to attract people to you.  To do this, consider doing the following things.

First, make sure to add in the words that you would search for when looking for someone to date. 

Most of the online dating communities will have search features where individuals will type in certain things to find the person that they are interested in.

This can include such things as age, religion, and areas, but it is also going to include some pretty important other words.  Remember, whatever words you would use to find someone else are those that you want to use in your profile.

When an individual is looking for you, they will type in these words into the search field.  If they are in your profile, guess who will show up as a possible person that they will match with?


This method will greatly enhance your chances of getting in front of people looking for the type of person that your are.  If you just put in the average comments, you are less likely to be found in all of those millions of people.  As frustrating as that sounds, it’s just the way that the system works.  Luckily for you, we have shown you how to improve your odds.

The more unique words and interesting things you add to your profile, the better.  The more details you provide the better.  Yet, do not go overboard in describing everything about yourself.

Step 2:  Finding Those You Are Interested In

Don’t run, you have to take this step too.  Again, the odds are that you will need to do whatever it takes to contact and work with someone that is interested in finding you.  You will have to make that first move and make it happen.

Yet, it does not have to be too hard or even difficult at all to do this.  Email makes the whole process easier.

Throughout this part of the process, you are looking for the right way to communicate with someone that is interesting to you.

Important Trick:

When contacting someone treat them as if they were your best friend. Don’t wait until they come to you. They are not going to take this first step.

Now, the first thing you need to do here is to find others that are potentially interesting people.

What do you look for in an online profile?

Well, we just went through an entire section about how to write a winning profile.  Now, you need to reverse it.

Again, you can use the searches that are provided for through the online service if you like.  Look for unique characteristics.  Instead of saying you are looking for someone that is smart, find someone that has a college degree or someone that likes to read.  Keep in mind that too many specific things can keep you from meeting many people that could fit within your life.

You need to insure that you are scanning through profiles carefully.  Again, positive people that have a great profile are the ones to go to.  Why?  They have taken the time and committed at least a few minutes to developing a profile that is interesting.  In other words, they are at least somewhat interested in online dating.

You should read through their profile and then decide if they are someone that you would be interested in.

When you find someone that sounds interesting, stop for a minute and ask yourself if you could see yourself with this person.  There is no sense in wasting your time on someone that you won’t like for some reason.  Yet… if you are not sure, they are worth contacting.

Yes, contacting.  Next we going to talk about writing that first email.

8:  Emails, Sending Them Effectively

Online Dating - Sending Emails Effectively

You have found a few people online that seem to be nice enough to talk with and maybe you are considering emailing them.

Who are you kidding!  If you want to be successful with online dating, you have to make the first move, no matter who you are, girl or boy!

After you have found a few people to contact, you will want to write out that first email.  Of course, you could instant message them, but that puts you and them more on the spot and may not be as wise of a choice at this point.

Instead, craft an email.  There are several tips to making that email effective.  First off, take the time to read through these tips as you will find there are a number of mistakes that you can make!

Email tips, what you need to include:

  • In your email, make sure you provide your name and where you found their profile.
  • Keep the tone of the email upbeat and interesting, not dull and boring.
  • A quick note is fine as long as it begins a conversation and is not just, “I saw your profile, email me.” This will not work.

You should introduce yourself and provide some information about you.

Tell them your name, your age and things about who you are.  You can tell them such things as your interests and your characteristics.

Do not bore them, but provide them with some information so that they can begin to build a bit more of an idea of who you are.  You want them to be able to remember you from one email to the next one that you send.  Give them something to think about!

Next, make sure that you provide some comments about their profile.  Mention that you also like to hang out at the beach or something else you share in common.

Find some common connection between their profile and your interests.  When you do that, you form a bond with them that can grow into something much more positive.  It helps to develop a conversation which is something you have to have to get a response from them.

Finally, make sure to include in your email a few questions to get the conversation going. Keep this to about two to three but make sure they are on different subjects.  You can ask them about their day to day life, about their pets, about the places that they grew up that you remember…whatever you can find to link you with them.

By doing this it will allow you to develop a relationship with them even at a very basic level.  They will now have something to say back to you and things can begin to roll nicely.

That first email is the ice breaker, but once it gets out, things will begin to roll from there.

9:  Turn On The Charm

 In addition to sending out that first email, there are going to be times when you will need to actually talk to the other person.  It may be just through email at first, but will likely lead to instant message conversations and then to the phone.

One thing that you will want to make sure comes through in the entire process is your charm.  No matter if you are a guy or girl; you want to give off the right impression to them through the words that you use.  People often do not realize that words typed do not have the same feeling as words said.  Therefore, you need to insure you use the write wording.

For example, you want to make sure you are saying things that will keep the conversation going in a positive direction.  You will need to choose your words wisely and accurately.  Do not say things sarcastically unless you are sure that they will get it.  It could easily turn out to be a big insult to them and hurt them.

One of the largest mistakes with online dating is letting the conversation go.  People will find themselves talking to someone through an email only to turn around and stop.

You need to insure that you say things that will bring up new things and keep things moving.  Many relationships fail because someone has stopped chatting.

It Doesn’t Stop There

Emails and instant messages are only good for a short period of time.  The fact is that you will need to take it to the next level at some point.  Again, girls and guys can do and should do this.  Don’t wait for someone else to make the right move.

If you wait, you are likely to lose out altogether on the relationship.

If you feel that it is time to give her or him a call, then it is time.  In fact, if you let this extend past the first few emails, then you may have lost your shot.  So, when you have spent some time talking back and forth and still are interested in this person, send them an email asking for their phone number.

Yes, it is okay to ask for their phone number in the first email but it is often a better bet to get it if you wait until the second email, or the one they reply to.

Saying The Right Thing

Are you worried that you will not say the right thing?  Perhaps you are thinking that there is not going to be a way for you to make that call or to contact that person.  You just would not know what to say.

If you take on this mentality, you are going to find yourself never getting anywhere when it comes to online dating.  Instead, use these tricks to help you get through the tougher times.

  1. At first, you are not talking to anyone other than someone that may turn out to be a friend. You are just meeting new people.  Think about this as you are staring to write to the other person.
  1. Next, really think about what you are writing but ask things that you are really interested in. If they made note of taking several trips in the last few years, ask them where they went and what they enjoyed on those trips.  Find things that you really want to know about.
  1. To be positive and have your personality come through, add your own comments and thoughts in. If they went hiking in an area that you did, simply comment about how or when you went there, your favorite part was at xyz point.
  1. Compliments work magic on people. You want to make sure that people feel good about themselves when talking to you.  You should say something like, “I thought your profile was really interesting.  You have a talent for writing!”  Compliments always bring a smile as long as they are in good taste and kept to just a few.
  1. Remember, if this does not work out with them, there are plenty of others out there. There is nothing on the line here.  The only thing that is at risk is your ability to go out and find someone for you.

10:  How Will You Do?

There are plenty of times when you will find yourself dealing with something you do not want to do.  But, before you write off online dating as being something that is just too hard to do, realize that the process is full of rewards.

Giving It Your Best

One thing that you will need to realize is that it does take countless opportunities to find that right person for you.  In other works, from the start you should realize that you have to fail at least a little before you will find that one person that is right for you.

Yet, to make this a better situation for you, think of it in a different manner.

Instead of thinking of someone as a potential girlfriend/wife or boyfriend/husband, think about them merely as a friend.

When you do this, you relieve the pressure which you just do not need to deal with.  You are simply out there, on the web, looking for people that will qualify to be your friends first.

Dealing With Rejection

It is bound to happen.  You are going to find situations in which you are going to be rejected.  You are going to find opportunities when you will succeed too.  Yet, dealing with the bad times will cause you to want to throw in the towel.  Before, you do that though; think about all of the benefits that we have discussed.  You can make this work.

If you find yourself facing rejection from those that you contact, realize that it is more than likely something that is going to happen because you and that person do not share enough in common.
If you do not do the things that we have discussed here, you are sure to find yourself dealing with rejection more often than not.  So, our second recommendation is to go back and to make sure that you have done what we have told you to do.  Is your profile current and accurate?  Is it appealing?  Does your profile contain information that would interest others?  Are you holding up the conversation on your end?  Are you taking it to the next step?

Here is an idea for you…

Invite a good friend to your home, someone that you really do trust and have them help you.  All they need to do is to read through your profile.  They can then tell you just how accurate it really is.  Have them answer these questions.

  • Does it portray you in the right light?
  • Is it portraying you in a positive light that is interesting?
  • Are they drawn in to it?
  • What’s missing?

When you do this you will be able to see things that you otherwise would not have been able to see.

11:  Meeting Them

Part of online dating is meeting other people.  You will need to invest the time necessary in finding others and really getting to know them.  You will need to meet them.  But, I know this can be quite daunting.

All of the same things that apply to standard dating relates to online dating when it comes to meeting others.  Nevertheless, it is a very different situation indeed.

There are many important things that you need to take into consideration first off though.  No, not what you will wear, but your safety.

Safety when it comes to online dating

When it comes to online dating meetings, safety has to be one of the largest things on your mind.  There is no doubt that there are bad guys out there and although there are people working hard to prevent the wrong person from getting into the community, it can happen anyway.

Therefore, here are a few very important rules that you need to keep in mind when it comes to online dating meetings.

  • Meet in a public area. You should meet in an area that has people around you.  This way, you can easily stay safe with the public’s watchful eye.  Avoid temptations to leave these types of areas on the first date.
  • Meet them someplace rather than allowing them to pick you up. This way, you have your own method of transportation for safety reasons.
  • Make sure that you feel comfortable with them. If you do not like that they are touching you, tell them so.  If this is a problem, leave.
  • Tell someone where you are going and what your plans are.
  • Stay in well lit areas that feel comfortable to you. You should know the area at least.

Keeping yourself safe is very important and is a very necessary step in the process of online dating.

But, these things are not going to get you out of the situation with a safe person that you really do not like.  We have a great tip for you to get out of a situation like this at any time.

First off, you will want to make sure to have a friend that you are comfortable with.  Tell them where you are going and what you will be up to.  When an online dating date does not go well, you need a way out and they are the person to help you.

Set a time for them to call you.  This should be a couple of hours into the date.  If when they call you, you are looking for a way out, then you can tell the date that something has happened and you need to leave.  You should not need to answer any questions here, though.

If all is going well, you can easily cut the conversation short and let them go.  It’s a great way to get out of a bad situation.

Meeting someone from an online dating community is not something that is easy to do, but it does allow for you to take the relationship to the next level.  But, remember, you have yet another first impression to make here.  Take the time necessary to make it a good one!

12:  Tips To Remember For Online Dating

When it comes to online dating, we have covered many of the basics but have also given you some great tips and tricks to having real success.

We’ve covered a lot of information here, so let’s summarise…

First off, your profile; you know just how important it is and why you need to select an online dating website that allows you to have one.  It just allows you to meet others that are like you.  It gives you a tool to provide information about yourself.

  • Positive, happy and inviting words should be used always!
  • Put pictures into it that show you happy and acting normally. Include several different, appealing shots.
  • Place key words into the descriptions in your profile so that those that are looking for your characteristics can find you. Remember, ask yourself what you are looking for.

You need to stop waiting for others to find you and to seek them out instead.  While your profile is designed to lure them in, you still need to get out there and find that perfect person.

Once you decide to contact someone, make sure that you ask questions, provide information about yourself and keep the conversation going.  If you do not do this, you will find yourself wasting your time.  Remember, within a few conversations through email or instant message, you need to ask for their number to keep things moving.

In addition, you need to realize that online dating is something that does take time to make happen.  Therefore, you will need to dedicate yourself to crafting a profile that is worthy and keep going even when you end up facing rejection from the other person.

13:  Online Dating Test Answers

One thing that we have not mentioned that can be of use to you is the online dating test.  These tests are supposed to be compatibility tests that will help the online dating site pair you up with others that are just like you.  Therefore, they are tools that can aid in providing you with help in finding the right person out there.

If you have selected to work with a good quality online dating website, these tests can be somewhat helpful.  Yet, they are also misleading and can be completely thrown off by you.

If you decide to make use of them, which you should do, you will want to take a couple of things into consideration.  First, make sure that you read through the process and really understand it.  Short cuts leave you frustrated and wasting your time.

Second, make sure that you are taking the test honestly.  There is no doubt that you can persuade the test in one direction or in the other.  It happens regularly actually.  We subconsciously allow ourselves to select a person that is what we think is right by simply answering questions in that manner.  This allows for the test to become nothing but worthless.

Instead of doing that, what we really need to do is to answer each question honestly and after giving it a bit of thought.  Otherwise, you will find yourself wasting your time.

In addition, do not limit yourself by what the test results show.  Instead, if you find someone that looks interesting to you, by all means call on them.  You will find them to be someone that is really someone you work with.  The problem is that these tests are just not accurate all of the time.

If you use it as a tool, it can help you greatly with your online dating.  Just do not rely solely on that test!


One thing that we all can say about online dating is that it can be a whole lot of fun.  Sure, we just put a whole lot of work on your plate and you may not be all that interested in doing it all.  Yet, think about the benefits that can come of it?

What’s more is that designing your profile for true success is something that you can do one time and benefit from in the long haul. Once you have perfected your profile, people will find you easily and you will receive emails from others that are interested.

Remember too that it is not all about what you look like or what job you have.  People are looking for other people that are just like them… normal.  Therefore, be honest in your profile and allow them to see just who you actually are.  In addition, you will want to find a way to make them smile and bring them in to you.  If you want them to email you, make sure you wording allows you to be attractive.

There is no doubt that rejection is part of the online dating process as well.  It’s just the way it is.  Yet, there is safety in knowing that rejection comes in the form of an email that can be easily deleted.  What’s more is that there is a database that is full of many more wonderful people that are looking to be with you.  You are all there for the same reason… finding someone to love.

We hope that you have found these tips to be useful which will lead you down the road to successful dating on the web.


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